Seagull Musings Column for April 4, 2004
Seventh District Congressman Roy Blunt recently announced that $65 million in federal funds had been approved for 10 southwest Missouri highway projects. In announcing his rationale for the funding Blunt said, “These projects will create jobs and make improvements to some of the heaviest traveled roads in southwest Missouri. The aim is to make these thoroughfares safer and more efficient.”
One can therefore understand the Ole Seagulls confusion as he read that one of those projects, the only one directly affecting those who travel in the immediate Branson area, is a $6.8 million extension of the Ozark Mountain Highroad. As he read Blunts rationale the Ole Seagull thought to himself, “Blunt must be getting his information on the Highroad from the same source that furnished the information to President Bush about the weapons of mass destruction in Iraq.”
But wait, that couldn’t be the case because Blunt goes on to say, “These projects were the consensus choices of elected and community leaders … for immediate upgrades.” It is beyond the comprehension of an Ole Seagull that, given the situation on Highway 65 between Branson and the Arkansas state line, any “community leader,” elected or otherwise, could even think about giving the Highroad priority over the “upgrading” of Highway 65.
Besides, what’s to make “safer and more efficient” on the Highroad? Are more people dying or involved in accidents on it than on Highway 65 between Branson and the Arkansas state line?
A school bus carrying your child or grandchild is traveling at 55 miles per hour and is being passed by an 18 wheeler and a steady stream of oncoming traffic going in the opposite direction also traveling at 55 miles an hour. Which road would you rather have that bus traveling on, the Highroad with its extra lane in each direction and meridian strip separating the bus from oncoming traffic or on Highway 65 south of Branson with nothing but a few feet of “spitting space” separating the school bus from the on coming traffic? Which road needs to be made “safer?”
In terms of the “heaviest traveled roads in southwest Missouri,” the only person that is lonelier than someone traveling on the Highroad is the Maytag repairman. By what kind of warped logic does the Highroad qualify as one “of the heaviest traveled roads in southwest Missouri?” What kind of creative imagination is necessary to even hint that an extension of the Highroad should take precedence over the upgrading of Highway 65 between Branson and the Arkansas state line?
How about the same logic that our “community leaders” use to fight gambling in Rockaway Beach on family value grounds while doing nothing to stop the expansion of the serving of alcohol in Branson’s theatres and attractions? What about the creative imagination of “elected leaders” who call Branson Landing, with its current anchors and “pimple” fountain, a “world class” attraction?
Here’s the Ole Seagulls favorite because, in his opinion, it illustrates the economic “false God” that a lot of this community’s leaders appear to pay homage to, “Do you really think that improving Highway 65 to the Arkansas line will bring more traffic to Branson?” In reply an Ole Seagull would suggest, “Who cares! Shouldn’t our priority be that whoever travels on Highway 65, tourists and local residents a like, travel on the safest road possible?”
Instead, what appears to be happening is that some of Branson’s “elected and community leadership,” is trying to make “lemonade” out of the “prune” called the “Ozark Mountain Highroad.” “But Seagull, you can’t get lemonade from a prune.” They know that but at least it’s “their prune juice.”
“Is that where the rational and logic for the Highroad getting priority over the upgrading of Highway 65 comes from, drinking their prune juice?” Hum, don’t know for sure but that could help explain the “stench” that an Ole Seagull, and others in our community, associate with the Highroad and its philosophy of economics before safety, for the benefit of the powerful and influential few, at the expense of the traveling public.
Gary Groman, a.k.a. “The Ole Seagull,” is an independent columnist and the editor of the Branson Courier. He may be reached by clicking here or by calling 417-339-4000.
